Most kids start a new school year this week or next. Thank goodness in this economy I don’t have to figure out how to strap a kid up with new school clothes and the latest best Trapper Keeper (what, don’t they still have those?). I was such a brat when it came time to starting school, I would always manufacture necessities when we were out shopping (”Yes, I totally need that protractor, and the compass, and the scientific calculator, and every single color of marker in the universe, yes yes, it’s all required”) because, well, I like new stuff, and back then I wasn’t familiar with the step of asking yourself “Do I really need this?” before I put it in the shopping cart, it was all about how much I could scam in one fail swoop. Pencils had to be brand new, last year’s notebooks were not good enough, no matter how unused they were, it all had to be new and shiny and exciting.
When it came to school clothes, I really had no fashion sense back then (thank God I’m super stylish now, wait, am I?) and I relied on my dad to pick my clothes out for me. How we arrived at this point I’ll never know, but somehow it was determined that my dad was someone who could be trusted to make the fashion decisions in my house. Maybe, as I reflect on this, he can help me share the blame of why I was so brutally picked on in school. Between the clothes, the bad hair, the freckles, the glasses, the chubbiness, and the supreme paleness (I was raised at the beach and was the ONLY PERSON, I swear, the ONLY ONE who could not tan), I spent the first day of school each year just wishing that a new ugly kid had moved to town over the summer to help carry the load of the teasing. This. never. happened. -K
I am looking forward to fall like you wouldn’t believe! It’s my favorite time of year for sure. I also think that it is the perfect time for family sessions; time to get that perfect portrait for your Christmas card, or even to use as gifts! If you are interested in booking a session with me, email me at djphotography@charter.net for current session rates and more info! I hope to hear from you!
A short while ago, I posted a sneak peek of Maddy…this weekend was dedicated to finally finishing her photos! I was very happy with how they turned out…you can’t deny that this family is full of love and happiness. Madelyn is one of the most gorgeous babies I’ve photographed. Her skin is like porcelein! And those eyes! Look out boys…this girly is gonna be a heartbreaker.
That little cry face is heartbreakingly beautiful!
This next collage is a special one for Sarah…just mommy and Maddy. You’re the best, Sarah! You’re a wonderful friend and co-worker. Love and hugs!
My son ‘88 took these photos of the fire in and around our neighborhood today.I will be posting updates from time to time but for now everything is fine. The fire rages on and there have been some evacuations but so far we are not in any danger. The air quality is quickly becoming an issue so that maybe a problem later in the week.
False Moon. Great shot.
Water Drop Plane
You can see more about this by reading Fire In The Sky pt. 1
Last week was the 1-year anniversary of my youngest son Percy’s diagnosis of Autism. This year I spent that evening in a room at my church with six amazing women, leading a training session for volunteers who want to help with the children in our special needs support group. What a positive way to spend the day!
Last year it was not such a positive day. I was looking back through the archives of my blog and remembering all the complicated emotions I felt back then- STILL feel. We have had a lot of highs AND lows since then, but I am happy to report that Percy has made some wonderful progress. His speech, especially the past month, has exploded. A year ago he mostly only said “ball”. Now he is talking in increasingly complex sentences! One of his new phrases is “I Love you”, unprompted. Oh it just killed us (in a good way) the first time he hugged his Daddy & me & told us that. What an INCREDIBLE feeling. He has also started to like to cuddle (when we can get him to hold still). THANK YOU, God. It used to break my heart when he wouldn’t let me rock him. But he has now started to realize that it feels nice… although if he had a choice he would rather cuddle DADDY. That deserves its own paragraph.
I am a stay-at-home mom & some days I find being around two emotionally-charged (we call it “not boring”) children utterly exhausting. I am pretty sensitive myself. Sometimes at the end of the day when Mapman gets home I am DONE, and he takes over. He is Mr. Mom a lot of nights, and even takes care of bathtime more often that not (I LOVE that man). I think Percy may have started to think that I am the babysitter and Mapman is the Mommy. He now prefers his Dad. If Daddy is around and I go to push Percy’s stroller he cries, “No, no! That’s Daddy’s!”, or if I try to unbuckle him from the car seat, it’s “No, Daddy can try it!” Funny use of words, but painful. I sometimes wonder what it is I have done to cause this. Maybe it’s because I spend a lot of my day trying to keep up with the mess the kids make in the house. I do play with my kids, but admit I probably don’t do it as much as I should (show of hands, anyone else feel this way?). Another part of it, I am sure, is that because of Percy’s Autism he prefers routine. We joke that he has “imprinted” on his Dad. I don’t always feel like laughing, though. I want to be FIRST, I want him to want Mommy most, but sometimes I am just too tired to BE Mommy. I HATE this. Actually, that is an understatement. Few things in life cause me as much pain and guilt as this.
Okay, enough. Back to the positive. Percy is 3 and almost 4 months and is finally almost done potty-training. ALMOST. We can’t get him to even TRY to poop on the potty, he asks for a diaper when he feels the urge. Any advice on how to help that along? He REFUSES to sit down & even try. Also, sometimes I have a hard time getting him to wear underwear because that is change, and in the world of Autism change is BAD. Some days it really upsets him. All he has ever known is a diaper. When I DO get him to wear underwear he doesn’t like it if the front is plain & the characters are only on the rear, so he wants to wear them backwards, saying ”NO! Goes right DERE!” Whatever, not a big deal, looks pretty cute, actually. Doesn’t change the fact that I am SO proud of my big boy. I know that potty training can be REALLY difficult for children with Autism Spectrum Disorders.
While we are talking about potty training, any advice on how to teach a 4 and 3/4 year old how to wipe his own rear end when he poops? He is almost 5. It’s TIME, Buddy. Part of the problem is that he fell in the potty once and is now afraid to shift his weight at ALL. His fear has him paralyzed. On a brighter note, his anxieties in general have lessened and disrupt his life less and less. Go Thomas!
On the flip side, a strange occurrence is that Percy has recently begun to have an INCREASE in rigid behaviors. He is finding more & more ways to order his universe, and he doesn’t get his way we take a trip to MELTDOWN CITY. I though as they got older it would DECREASE, but maybe not. We are trying to find a balance between respecting some of his need for routine while also trying to teach him how to be flexible. Some days it is really hard, wondering & worrying what will set him off. Other days there are NO problems. I am thankful for those days!
Even with these struggles, sometimes I feel guilty about how well Percy is doing. I have friends whose children are still non-verbal, not potty trained, don’t show them affection. I feel it wouldn’t be fair to them if I talk about our victories too much. That is a self-imposed feeling, and I know they don’t begrudge me my joy. But I also know it would be hard for them and I want to be sensitive. I am constantly overthinking my words & second-guessing myself when I talk to them, worried I will say the wrong thing.
Actually, Percy is doing so well that some people in his life are beginning to question his diagnosis. I have mixed emotions about this. I don’t want to unnecessarily label him, but I am trying to be REAL and INFORMED about the challenges he faces. I firmly believe that he is on the Autism Spectrum. Yes, he is on the mild end & apparently in his own little category… he does not fit any standard diagnosis, but has enough autistic behaviors to place him on the Spectrum. I remind people it is a SPECTRUM, and that while Percy obviously does not have Classic Autism he does have many characteristics. Since these characteristics are not always apparent to observers I start to wonder if they think I am overreacting. But Mapman & I see things every day that other people don’t get to see.
None of these things change the fact that Mapman & I love Percy VERY much and feel very lucky to be his parents. He is a smart, creative, funny, energetic little guy who loves us and ADORES his big brother, Thomas. We think Thomas is pretty awesome, too.
One more anniversary this month~ Mapman and I also just celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary. We have been able to find a sitter we trust and have actually had TWO dates in the past month (YEAH!). We are enjoying each other & trying very hard to keep our marriage strong. Happy Anniversary to a wonderful husband & phenomenal father. I love you!
It’s been a little bit since I have made a new post. I just have been so busy with football starting and Richard’s promotion to Chief.
Football right now is an everyday thing and we hardly got to see Richard through this process. He left today untill October 2nd. I must admit it relieves alot of stress with wondering if he will come home for things and wanting him home to see him. This way I just automatically know he will not be here. It relieves alot of stress off him because he can focus on things he needs to do..get this whole inititation thing out of the way and not worry about coming home and wanting to be home. I feel bad for him that he is going through all of this…but it’s just how it is and when it’s over with on September 18th he is going to be totally HAPPY!!!
So what I do is just hold it down at home. Been doing things for the boys and football everyday and just doing whatever else needs to be done at home. It is somewhat difficult being pregnant and not being able to move around like I used to, but it hasn’t been all too bad. I just take things one day at a time. Make sure I do make time to rest, I eat well, and I make sure I drink plenty of water. I always have an issue with getting my fluids in but this time with being pregnant it’s something I can’t just slack on.
But so many things have happened since I posted here last….. I will just make it quick. Alot of people already know how most of the tings I have posted turned out! LOL!
Well my babygirl had her birthday! I can’t beleive she turned 4. She is just this shining star in our lives and it’s hard to see her growing so quickly.
Yes! I did make her birthday outfit! Hehehe I FINALLY made something!!! LOL!!!
All in all she had a wonderful one. Like we do withe every birthday, they are with just us and we make sure the focus is purely on the birthday person/s and they call the shots on things they want…hehehe.
Speaking of the princessa………
She did something that was considered horrific in our household…lol! My poor babygirl chopped off her hair!!!!
OMG I was almost in tears because I love her hair. But it was nothing compared to how traumatized Richard was! Well I email him to tell him and he friggin calls from the ship ASAP! I mean…he doesn’t call me usually but the man called quick and was demanding pictures. He was LIVID!!! I sent him pics….he said he was so upset he didn’t want people to see the pic of her and had made everybody leave his workspace so he could see the pic.
You know….alot of people may not think it’s a huge deal and will say, “Oh my daughter did that too.” or “it’ just hair, it will grow back!” But to Richard…everything on this little girl is a sacred thing to him. He waited 5 boys to finally have a daughter. 5 BOYS!!!!! I can’t even put into words on how much he loves this little girl and how much he caters to her every whim. SHE is the most important female in his life. Daddy’s gem! I could go on…..but it’s just too much. But he was traumatized and when she knew I had told him she freaked out and was crying. Well she was crying also because she didn’t want to go get it fixed and have it cut short. Ummm hello little girl…you cut it! Anyway…..I pulled my skills out and as hard as it is to fix her hair now I can actually still tie it back and I think both her and daddy will be okay now, lol!
Good grief! Hopefully she wont be doing that again! I thought this whole house was going to fall apart! Even the boys were freaking that she did that! YES they are like that with her. I mean I will buy her skirts and my oldest will be like, “Mama why do you buy her those things? You KNOW she doesn’t keep her legs closed!” I mean sheeessshhh!!! It’s like dealing with 5 other daddies around here! She’s so lucky mama is here! LOL! When somebody has something to say about her wearing a skirt or her bathing suits I am usually like, “Just shut your mouth okay?! When you are the one going out and buying everything around here..you can choose.”
I only have 2 boys playing football now. Rian isn’t playing anymore because of Richard having issues with the coach.
Let me back it up a bit……..
Okay so Richard was assisting coaching on Rian’s team. Like last year he wans’t there much but he did what he did when he was there. Richard is VERY knowlegable about football and not only knows everything about it, but loves to play it too and DID play it. Played it in highschool and played for his command in Japan. HE LIVES AND BREATHES FOOTBALL. Anyway…so you are supposed to have a headcoach that knows his stuff right?! Well…this head coach doesn’t know what the hell he is doing. When Richard would show up he would just step back and Richard would be running the whole practice. When Richard wasn’t there…it was like these boys were doing nothing! I mean…it was and is BAD. So many parents were comin gup to Richard asking for help and tellin ghim he NEEDED to be there. But of course he is in the military and that just can’t happen. So Richard spoke with the commisioner of the football league and he set up a meeting with the coach and parents. The parents pretty much were upset and told him how they felt. But then again what can you do? They can’t just find another coach right now…so I guess some kind of understanding was met. If Richard could..he def would have taken over the team and coached them himself. First off….this coach has his son on his team…the kid isn’t good at all and the coach is so concerned about where to put his son. When Richard wasn’t there..it was like the team revolved around his son! I mean I can go on…but it’s too long.
Well anyway the scrimages come up and Richard coaches the first one. They win that one. We go to watch our other sons play but when Richard hears the team is playing a harder team he runs off to go help. Well when he gets there the dumbass coach has boys in positions they know NOTHING about and they have no idea what they are doing. Richard takes things like that seriously because kids can get injured. So he’s upset and like what the hell are you doing?!!! Well the coach put his hands on Richard’s chest and tells him to calm down and he could kick him off the field if he wanted to. SO YEAH…Richard was PISSED. First off he doesn’t take too kindly to some other guy putting his hands on him. So shoves his hands off..takes himself off the field and takes little Rian right along with him. We had quite a few parents come up to us afterwards really upset about everything that happened and the fact that Richard wont be there anymore. Richard feels bad for the boys and for Rian. We actually really did ask Rian over and over again if he still wanted to play and he said he didn’t. I mean…it’s not like he will miss out much. He has his daddy always teaching him stuff and they are constantly playing football here at home. I must admit it is a bit of a relief. Richard was always stressed even seeing what an idiot that coach was and dealing with him and it will be a little easier on me dealing with only 2 boys in football. That team is still having so many issues an alot of the moms will see me and fill me in, so I am actually happy that my son is not part of such a messed up situation!
(Rian is in the Orange socks…hehehe)
But Rian will be helping out on Dominic’s team. The coaches know him and really like him. They see how he is with football and how good he is. Is is called, “Macho Macho” hehe. Also The coach for Dominic’s team asked Richard to come and help him out on the Offensive line so that is what Richard will be doing when he gets back in October. Richard is way more comfortable with these coaches that know what they are doing. He worked with them last year also.
Well on to Dominic….
Now that he is not living in Donny’s shadow anymore..he has been doing really well on his team. He seems pretty rounded out. He is a starter on the Defense as the safety and he’s a backup running back and quarterback.
He had his gear off before I could snap a pic! Darn! LOL!
They still call him “Mighty Mouse”. Hehehe… I really look forward to seeing him out there now. Last year it was like his heart wasn’t in it. But this year he seems to enjoy it more and he really is into it now.
Now on to Donny……
Well what can I say about this kid? I def and surprised by him. I didn’t expect him to be as good as he was last year. I mean last year he wasn’t good at first and them out of nowhere he just became this friggin powerhouse lineman that dominated and lead the team in sacks. People were shocked that it was only his frist year playing football. I really didn’t expect much this year. Mainly because he moved up in division…the kids are bigger and better. So I just kept telling him he may not be a starter and to just work hard. Plus football politics are there..where the kids who were previously on the team (the vets) are the starters n’ stuff. WELL…low and behold Donny is indeed a starter! A lineman again and getting those sacs!!!! I mean it’s even weird seeing him out there because the other boys on the line next to him are HUGE! When Richard spoke with the coaches they were like, “We didn’t expect Donny to be good because he was always messing around but when we started doing hitting and doing the defensive drills we were shocked!!! He’s good!!!” With this team they are very serious. I mean they are GOOD and will probaly go to the superbowl they have in Florida. N’ for Donny to have earned such a spot on this team is AWESOME!
Here he is on the defensive line. You can see him wearing the one orange sock…if you can’t see him on the line you can see him gettin gup from the pile from sacking the quarterback and if you rewatch it was origionally Donny that had the quarterback. He’s number 2!
Recently I have had some thing shappen that really made me see some people in a better lite. I mean..I already knew how they were. But sometime it’s still shocking to see how little regaurd they have for me and my family. Also how little they want to do for themselves. I mean heck…people that have not really ever been there for me…and I am supposed to inconvenience my family over them?! It just makes me appreciate who I have grown to become as a person and what I have in life. I have been through alot…and I know why. Things happen for a reason……….. Karma is a B!!!!
So here I am……..I feel like so many things are different right now. Alot of things are happening all at once and I am doing my best to catch up and adjust. All of my 6 children will be in school this Sept. It will def be weird to me. I mean..it’s been like 11 years. I don’t know what it’s like to not have a baby at home to take care of. It almost makes me really sad! Richard made rank and will be gone alot. We will have most of October with him and half of November, December and BAM he will be leaving us for 8 months. I will be giving birth to A&C’s baby boy in November! Giving birth is always a huge thing! I am really excited about it. A&C are just WONDERFUL and when you are doing this for people like them and you have their baby in your tummy the baby just is this special little being and the whole thing keeps replaying in my head on how they will react to seeing thier baby for the first time!!!
I just have a million things in my head. I guess it could be due to Richard not being here. It will smoothen out eventually for me. It always does…. I always adjust and get into routine. Then it seems normal…alot of work…but normal.
Well folks, today I am celebrating my 2nd bloggiversary, well today is actually 2 years, 1 month, 1 week and 1 day since HPP started, ok, I admit it, I forgot about HPP’s bloggiversary this year
Anyhoo, moving on from my bloggy negligence, I would like to celebrate by offering you lovely people a little giveaway. These days it is all about the babywearing mama gnome keychains, there are none in the shop at the moment as I am busy like a bee making custom gnomes for a group of lovely Irish & UK babywearing mamas. This weekend I should have a few spare moments and will hopefully get to repopulate Little Pixie Shoppe with a few more gnomes keychains.
The custom orders are great fun to make, it is delightful having other people choose the colour combos for me. And, as you know, all profits from the shop are going to a children’s charity, so the big pile of custom orders is absolutely wonderful to receive! Speaking of custom orders… I have penciled in a little treat for HPP readers in my crafting calendar… read on…
Oooh tell me more!
In order to celebrate HPP’s 2nd bloggiversary, I would like to give not one, but two of you the chance to design your own babywearing mama gnome! You can choose the style of babycarrier she wears and choose your favourite colour combos from my big pile of multi-coloured eco-felt, now doesn’t that sound like a fun prize!
Oooh I want one! What do I do?
Simply visit my flickr collection of mama gnomes, and then come back here & leave a comment telling me which is your favourite so far. Simple as pie!
Would you like two entries into the draw?
Yes? If you feel like blogging about the mama gnomes or the giveaway, feel very free to do so, then pop back here and leave me another comment linking to your post! Et voila, you now have two chances to win!
But I’m from a faraway land! Don’t fret, in the interests of fostering international communication and spreading world peace, this prize is open to all of you, humans, Narnians, Capricans, Vulcans, even (gasp) those without a blog, wherever you happen to be on our fine planet!
Just make sure to include a valid email address with your comment so I can find you, and I’ll pick 2 random winners on Wednesday 2nd September at 18:00 GMT. Duplicate entries will be removed and put on the naughty step.
Here’s the small print…
Babywearing mama gnome keychains are for your bag or your keys, not for your child. They are small with metal parts, so not a good child’s toy at all. OK!?
I love, love, love shooting with families that I know. I am always blown away to see sides and parts of personalities that I’ve never seen before, even though I’ve known them a long time. I’ve done shoots and covered birthdays for my good friends, the Christy family before, and I LOVE every chance I get to do a session with them. This time is was because little J. was turning 4, and his daddy was turning 36. What a great way to celebrate–chilling at the park with their favorite photographer! Seriously, Happy Birthday to you both, enjoy the sneak peek.
And this one because it makes me smile, literally, every time I see it.
We have been journeying south to Brazil with Gospel for Brazil since 2004 (four missions total) to share the truth, grace, love and hope of Jesus Christ with the lost and hurting of Brazil, particularly the northeast desert region of the state of Ceara. Each and every trip we come back stronger christians with a greater knowledge of God’s Ways and changed as people. You can’t walk into the fire without a lot of old and unclean ways of this world being burned off to be left behind in a pile of ashes.
When we are in Brazil, we know we are walking in the center of God’s Will for us. We know we are there for a specific purpose, as a group and as an individual. We may not fully know all of God’s purpose for us being in the desert of Brazil but it’s not important we have it all figured out.
However, we often get asked, “Why do you go?” or “Is it worth it?” or “Couldn’t you just send the money you’re wasting by going to the ones in need?” And this is from fellow christians. Most of the time, I don’t even indulge the ignorance. You just won’t convince them of it’s true spiritual value.
So, as confirmation to us that go and to all christians, I would like to share a letter that our GFB pastor in Tiangua sent to Joe. I think it answers these questions perfectly.
Ok, so we know that Candidiasis is caused by a group of fungi called Candida.
That’s great.
But how on earth does a normally peace-loving fungus get so het up that it wants to attack it’s host? After all, we live with them and a whole gang of bacteria day-in and day-out with no problem what-so-ever.
Let’s look at your own life. What gets you mad, hey, what gets you feeling even a little aggro?
The weather… a day that is unbearably hot and humid, or constant rain?
Hormones…. too much or too little and watch your mood swing!
Drugs…. too much caffeine, not enough caffeine?
Food …. not enough, too much or just plain wrong?
Now if you were a fungus living in an environment and that environment changed which resulted in making you uncomfortable or worse, you’d get a bit grumpy too.
If you were to wear tight clothing that didn’t allow your skin to breathe, took hormones – like the Pill or cortisone – or didn’t dry your skin properly you’d affect the environment that the fungus lives in.
By the same token, if you were given the opportunity to multiply or expand your empire, you’d also jump at that chance wouldn’t you?
Well, by compromising your immunity by doing things like having a poor diet, being under constant stress, taking antibiotics that kill off the competition and using harmful recreational drugs your immunity doesn’t have the strength to fight the invading army. Easy pickins for the fungi!
It was the weekend and I was home relaxing with some afternoon cable programs. You gotta love cable it really gives you so much to choose from!
Anyway, I am looking at the listings and there is Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings, Vampires, Psychics, Ghost Stories, Exorcists, more teen aged Sorcery…the list goes on and on…Then I started to think about all of the Christian Fundmentalists out there that seem to be so upset about these movies and programs and complain and ban them in their congregations. You know somebody always have something to say…
But as I recall growing up there was all sorts of shows about magic, and I don’t remember anyone complaining back then…”Bewitched”, “I Dream of Jeanie”, “Bell, Book and Candle”, and one of my favorite movies “Bed Knobsand Broomsticks!!”
Jeez! these were movies with James Stewart, Angela Landsbury, and many made by Disney. So what is the difference now?? I guess one could say there is allot more violence? But that really doesn’t have to do with the theme of the supernatural…That’s in everything today, from drama to thrillers. We have just evolved into a more violent society.
I happened to catch “Bed Knobs and Broomsticks” on the TMC channel and had a great time. There is so much magic in the world around us. I just wish more people could relax and let it flow.
And you know what?? If you happen to think about it…You can tell your kids that you had better movies than Harry Potter and maybe rent it and share it with them some weekend. I bet the young ones like “Bed knobs and Broomsticks” better than some of the programs available today.
So I decided to post a video on one of my favorite scenes and songs. I hope you enjoy.
It’s amazing the joy children can bring, even when you are down and or don’t feel like being bothered a child can smile and brighten your entire day. This morning I had the rare opportunity to spend time with my daughter and two nieces all of the same age and born within the same year. Nothing major, we skipped and played my version of Simon says (Mommy says), and took a time out at a nearby park. Amazingly enough it got my day going and set my day in motion with a great mood and of course revelation about life. We take things so seriously especially things we shouldn’t. I among others am guilty of this very thing. Look at children play and watch the beauty of their innocence. They can create fun from grass and a couple of sticks if you allow them. Though understanding the world viewed through their eyes for them often times is a bit difficult, learning rules, memorizing necessary idiosyncrasies and the like they still break down the world around them in very simplistic terms. They eat, play, poop, learn and sleep. Now, now don’t get me wrong of course their day is a little more than this bland description but in comparison to ours (adults) very simple nonetheless. There is a lot we can learn from a day in the life of a child. The way they view the world around them and everything they intake. From their excitement for life and learning to their resilience and commitment to discovery.
CHILD CARE expert Dr Penelope Leach has slammed politicians for making decisions about family issues they don’t fully understand.
Speaking to a packed tent at the Edinburgh Book Festival today (Tues), she said that the problem with the options available to parents today was that the policy makers have never experienced the problem themselves.
She said: “Hardly any politicians, academics or policy makers find it necessary to leave their own infants in the first few months in less than high quality child care.
“Quite a lot of them have no idea what it would be like to have no other choice.”
“No choice”
The expert – who has been an authority on child development since the 1970s – said that politicians have the money to pay for nannies or to support their wives choice to stay at home.
She added: “Young parents, especially young single parents, have no choice but to take any old job they are given because they are told that they will stop receiving benefits if they don’t.”
Dr Leach explained that once maternity leave had expired, there was only a certain amount of time that young single parents could choose to stay at home with their children before getting their financial lifeline cut.
During the talk, which stemmed from her new book, Child Care Today, Dr Leach said that the British childcare system didn’t work – and that it should be modelled more on the system in other countries.
Monthly payment
She said: “We need to give parents choice.
“In France mothers are offered a monthly payment that they can do whatever they feel necessary with.
“They can treat it as their salary, or they can use it to pay for child care while they go out and work.”
She explained that almost 50 per cent of a mother’s earnings were cut as soon as she had a child, either by taking the lower maternity payment, or by paying for childcare.
And she went on to say that it should be every taxpayer that funds the necessary system, not just parents.
Stable child care
She said: “It has to be paid for by taxpayers in exactly the same way that education is.
“If it was only people with children who paid for education then we wouldn’t be able to fund them through primary school.
“It will cost the country less in the long run if we provide excellent, stable childcare for babies and young children.
“It will cost less for the health system and less for the law.”
Whitney Houston spotted with her daughter Bobbi Kristina Brown at Newark Airport in Newark, New Jersey on 8/20/2009.
When I saw this picture I was almost on the floor to see that Whitney’s teenage daughter has a freakin gap in her front teeth. What the hail??? Is this teenage daughter also a lil crack head? Piece of advice to Whitney and her daughter, Bobbi: When you receive your first pay check from your new album? Please do not spend all your money on crack! Make a dentist appointment for your teenage daughter and put braces on her!!
My son left for college in the fall of 2007 for his first semester. He went to a college far, far away from home. The best way I can describe how I felt is “mourning”. I was mourning the end of the time he would live with us full time. Now that he’s been at college for a few years, and we’ve moved a whole lot closer to where he attends, and since we’ve replaced him with a Shih-tzu, I am doing much better.
A few weeks ago, Adrienne Carlson contacted me about writing a guest post for I Throw Like a Girl. So, I asked her to write an article on how mothers feel when their kids go off to college for the first time. I think she did an excellent job and I hope her advice will help those of you who are experiencing an empty nest or almost empty nest for the first time. Please thank Adrienne for me by leaving her some comments and by visiting her website!
Here’s Adrienne:
Mothers’ Emotions over Children’s First College Experience
You carry them in your body for nine months or so, nourishing and nurturing them as they get ready to be born into this world. You then spend the next 17 years taking care of their every need, cosseting them when they need to be pampered, taking them to task when they need to be disciplined, offering them a shoulder to cry on and words of wisdom when they’re emotionally distressed, and tucking them in to bed every night with a kiss even though you’ve just yelled at them for not keeping their room clean.
Parenting is a tough job, but one that offers a great deal of joy in return. As a mother, you love your kids more than anything else in the world. Maybe it is because they are a part of you, maybe it is just the way motherhood is – the moment you know they are going to leave home for college, you are torn between two conflicting emotions. On the one hand, you are filled with joy because your child is now an adult, all grown up and off to college. But on the other, your heart feels heavy because your young one is now ready to leave the nest and you’re going to have an empty room instead of a messy one.
It’s hard to take when your child is moving away from home, even if it’s for a short span of time. You know that things will never be the same again and that your son or daughter is starting their journey of life, on a path that is now going to take a different route from the one you take. You know that your paths will cross every now and then, but from now on, your baby is on his or her own.
Once your child has settled in college, you’re going to have to prepare yourself for many changes – from calling home often in the first few months, he or she is going to almost forget you when they’re busy with their friends, lessons and other social activities at school and not call for many days together, unless it is to ask for money. It may be difficult to cut the apron strings loose, but that’s just what you have to do if you want your child to be independent and responsible.
The visits home are going to become rare because your child is going to want to go away with friends during vacations or better still, secure positions as interns in order to get a head start on their careers. As a mom, you must also brace yourself for major or minor disasters when your child comes home distraught because of an affair that has gone wrong or any other emotional problem. You may have warned them beforehand, but even so, when it happens, offer comfort and constructive advice instead of saying “I told you so”.
Throughout all this, it is your responsibility as a mother to pray for them and with them, talk to them about their concerns and activities, avoid interfering in their lives unless you’re asked to, and reassure them that you love them and are there for them, no matter what.
By-line:
This guest article was written by Adrienne Carlson, who regularly writes on the topic of online christian colleges . Adrienne welcomes your comments and questions at her email address: adrienne.carlson83@yahoo.com.
One of the first words most children learn to say is No. The right to assert your personal will kicks in at an early age. What you want becomes the supreme and overriding concern. Parents battle with this will to make compliant and obedient children and it seems to me that we spend the rest of our lives learning when and how to say no and when to let things ride.
I’ve been thinking about things I’ve learned in my twenties and one of those lessons is when to say no, working out when it’s okay for me to assert my personal will and stop what I don’t want to happen to me from happening.
I used to be the girl who couldn’t say no – I didn’t want to cause confrontation so I would comply against my wishes to avoid conflict.
But the past few years, I’ve learnt it’s reasonable to say no to a relationship that is detrimental to me and to say no when people want to take advantage of my good nature. That I’m allowed to say no to people I respect and admire if they ask me to do something unreasonable or if I feel they’ve not got my best interests at heart. Learning to say no at the right time, means learning not to be a doormat and finding out when compassion or even politeness stops, and being abused in some way begins. Saying no has saved me repeating heartbreak or making stupid mistakes twice. I wish I’d learned to say no earlier!
Discovering I can say no to things, and the world will keep spinning is immensely liberating. Knowing that I can choose to say no makes it easier for me to make decisions about what I want to do with my life, where I want to go and why and how, because I’m clearer about what I won’t put up with.
I’m still learning this though, and there are things coming up all the time that I should say no to but don’t until it’s too late. But practise makes perfect!
