I’m about 99% sure that if I ever get married, there will be no children involved. One, because I want to have a career that will leave me with very little time to spend changing diapers and wiping spit-up off my expensive clothing; two, because most marriages end in divorce, and divorce is hell on children involved in them. Case in point: my parents are ridiculous beings, and insist on involving me in their ridiculousness at almost every turn.
It’s spring break, and I have two weeks off this year. Which should be a time for me to just relax and not have to stress or worry about anything. But no, I have to deal with my dad’s demand that I spend time with him, and my mom’s constant need to monopolize my time. I love my dad, but honestly, I really just want to sit at home-my mom’s house-and do nothing. This break was supposed to give me some alone time. My mom is working and my sister is at school. Except the only time I could spend with my dad was this week, and he doesn’t work outside the home, and my step-mom has a job, she just never seems to go to it. So I’m going to have no time alone. What I really want to do is stay up late, sleep in late, watch crap tv and lay around with my laptop. But of course my dad wants to give me a hard time for sleeping in, and then he’s always bugging me about doing things, or talking to him. I don’t want to fucking talk. I just want to spend my break by myself. Because before I know it, it will be time to go back to school, back to living with 100 other girls, back to living with my roommate. And it’s kind of hard to get time alone when my roommate is always around. To top it off, by the time I go back to my mom’s house-where I really want to be-I’ll be getting my wisdom teeth out, and my mom will constantly be around.
It’s so frustrating. I’m constantly put in the middle because they each want to spend as much time with me as possible, and it’s like a constant tug-of-war for who gets me when. I’m just glad that there aren’t any formal “parenting times” anymore. That was torture when I was younger, and it would be even more annoying now. I honestly can’t wait to go to college, so I won’t have to deal with this anymore. I thought it would be different when I went away to school this year, but it’s not. Hence, me not having children. I don’t want to put any children through the hell that I go through sometimes.
“Another day, another dollar,” That’s what most working class folks say as they drag themselves out of bed to head to an office where anyone barely knows their name unless they need something. Yup…you guessed — it’s another day at the office. Or the sh*t hole, as most employees commonly refer to it. The office is the one place where you are guaranteed to be underappreciated, overworked, left out, judged, criticized and expected to deal with it – all for the love of a small paycheck and a short lunch break. It’s the American way.
survive. You heard correctly…the game! Most of your of coworkers could care less about you. Sure, you may have that one whom you eat lunch with regularly, but don’t be fooled by the 30 minute company. They’re only hanging with you until quitting time. At the end of the day, they run off into the night to be with someone way more important than you are. Don’t be offended by this. Trust no one and keep a very positive “F*ck You” attitude! 
Let’s take a look at a typical work day, shall we? After you’ve finished reading this article, you will be able to determine if you have the chops to be someone’s personal slave right-hand man in a general office environment. Don’t expect to be prepped for the journey you are about to take. That wouldn’t be realistic in Cubicle Land. Instead, we’re just going to throw you to the wolves and see how you fend for yourself.
Most commonly, the workday opens with you complimenting your supervisor on yet another one of his boring staff lectures. However, because you are so stoned and hung over from the night before, you are too wasted to realize that that lecture was last Thursday. Don’t be alarmed. There are so many of those meetings that begin and end with the same speech your boss delivers like a walking TIVO, they all sound alike. Just continue kissing his ass and hope he doesn’t smell the alcohol that’s oozing out of your pores. Too much talking will raise suspicion as you’d normally try to avoid any conversation with him, in effort not to be given any more work assignments, so know when to the shut up and walk away.
If you’re lucky enough to make it pass your boss unscathed, you’re off to a good start. But you’re not out of the water yet. It won’t be long before that very same boss calls you from your desk, by the wrong name of course, to ask you a ton of questions that you’re expected to the know the answers to, although it will probably be the first time you’ve ever heard anything about the subject in which your boss is referring. Just nod and smile and tell him/her that you’ll get right on it. Once you’ve wiped that discreet worried little smirk off your face, go back to your desk, take a swig of that stale coffee you got from the cafeteria and check your email. Not your work email! That’s too responsible. Check your personal 
email. You’re not a lazy, disgruntled employee until you’ve mastered the art of slacking off. Who knows? Something may be good enough to give you a reason to use sick leave for the rest of the day. If you have a fear that your computer is being monitored, here’s what you do: after you’ve nearly killed yourself to get the answers your superior is looking for, take a baseball bat and use their head as target practice. That way, they’ll understand the headache you got trying to obtain those damn answers. Remember the motto for every office across the nation – “An eye for an eye; a tooth for a tooth.” 
I do that that picture is far less than just bad lighting. It’s one f*cked up picture. No, seriously. Oh well, one catastrophe at a time. Accept being the butt of the joke and make a mad dash for the first restroom you see before you stink up the whole place with the bubbles building up inside your tummy. Just don’t forget to leave a memorable message to that very same security guard, telling him exactly what you think of him. This will probably be the hightlight of your day. Don’t worry. It’s almost over. 
By now, the office has completely fallen apart and you are stressed to no end. You’ve received an email from your kid’s babysitter informing you that an emergency has come up and that you need to pick up your offspring. Naturally, your boss isn’t going to approve your leave and there’s no daycare facility at your job. You have no other choice but to bring your 
baby back to work and scotch tape them to the bulletin board. Don’t make it a habit. In your colleagues’ eyes, you have a choice to make: either work or home? But with the money you make, you can probably build yourself a nice cardboard home right next to your office building. How convenient would that be?! …that is if you haven’t completely keeled over from all the stress. In that case, make sure your last will and testament is saved on your computer. Your lunch buddy will want to know if he can get your swivel chair once you’ve kicked the bucket for good. 
Since your id badge didn’t work and the security guard is no doubt looking for your ass for leaving that harsh message on the bathroom floor, you now have to be just as crafty and creative in getting out of the building as you were for surviving your day in general. Well let me give you two choices: Dig a hole and claw your way to freedom or simply burn the whole effin’ building down. Why should you be the only miserable person in the office? Whatever you choose, your decision will take a little effort but it’d be worth it. Having the gall to pull it off is the main issue, though it’s not has hard as it sounds. After all, 90% of any effort is getting started. 
authors, millions of readers may find their butts clench at the thought.
The art of layering natural fibers for comfort and warmth
The sound of the ticking of time catches my ear, as I look up at the clock to find that it has already passed me by. There was once a time when time was not akin to an airplane’s passing overhead, hearing the sound, as the airplane passes over and looking up into the Sky, only to find it’s entrails that have been left in its wake, along with the sound of its passing by. Following it’s entrails of smoke, after burn, you come to find that the plane is much farther ahead of the sound that you hear. In the case of the airplane’s passing overhead, you tend to be able to follow the entrails, like a path, that leads you in the direction that the airplane has gone. If only time was that way…
I can remember in days past, as a child, the days seeming to linger on and the nights seeming to stretch for hours. Time seeming to stand still. Now, as I’ve grown older, it seems as though the days and nights fly by like that airplane overhead. Time never standing still, only ticking at a quickened pace, beckoning to us to pause sometime and enjoy it, because if we don’t stop to enjoy the time we are given we will definitely miss it. It will have passed us by and even though we can hear it tick away, with the movement of the hands on the clock, there are no trails left behind by time for us to follow so that we can find where it has gone. 
“Nothing is more powerful that Beauty in a wicked World…”
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Your love and approval is the most important thing to your child. Because of this need for your love, your child will want to respond and meet your expectations. It is important that limit setting is a carefully thought-out procedure, one that is designed to convey understanding, acceptance and responsibility to your child.
